1991-1200 Poem by Karen de Nitto, New York from 1992-0600 Sudarshan, Volume 1, Number 3, Pages 12 and 13

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Tags: Poetry Karen de Nitto 1991 New York 1992-0600 Sudarshan Story of Poem


I tried.
I tried.
My whole life
I tried
to give him the light,
when would I just stop trying
too hard, and let God do the singing?

Even on his death bed
I read him Psalms
Yea, though I walk through the valley
of the shadow of death, Thou art with me...
Did he hear the song?

He never knew You yet,
in his last days
I could feel the presence of God
wrap around him like a Mother's love.

A powerful embrace
by a Mother who
just would not let
this child be lost in Hades.
He had wandered aimlessly
into the underworld
and She came and found him.

Only God knows why
She came for him,
this man once was good
yet had become so hard,

Rescued and taken
to where love becomes new
and the rest of us are still here
trying to let God
do the singing.


SourcesS1. 1992-0600 Sudarshan, Volume 1, Number 3, Pages 12 and 13.


Story1992-0000 Author's preamble to the poem from 1992-0600 Sudarshan, Volume 1, Number 3, Page 12: "I had the opportunity to go to Diwali puja (October 1991). Just before I left to go to Cabella, I found out that my father had cancer. I left not knowing what would happen the ten days I was away. At the opening of the puja talk, Shri Mataji seemed to miraculously speak about the subject: "When My father died, I was surprised that suddenly I became thoughtless, absolutely thoughtless - neither the thought of pain or thought of unhappiness or anything came up, but just thoughtless. And everybody was surprised because I looked after him and I mean, he was very attached to Me, very fond of Me. Everything was there, but I was surprised, how is it I became suddenly thoughtless."
"So if you're a Sahaja Yogini, then at the time of crisis, you should become thoughtless, that's one of the signs. I've seen Myself, if there is any crisis in the family, I just become thoughtless, That means what? That God just takes you in your problems: He puts his hand, He puts His protection and He takes you out of it and makes you absolutelv thoughtless, and in that thoughtless awareness you discover what is right, and what is wrong. So, even in crisis, this thoughtless awareness is al the time extremely alert. It becomes much more alert than normal. That's the sign of a Sahaja Yogi and sign of Sahaja Yogini".
Her words gave me strength and peace. I returned to find my father very ill, and he died shortly afterwards. I had the remarkable experience of feeling my father being taken by Shri Mataji to some safe realm. I felt joyful most of the time, so much so that I looked "inappropriately happy" at the funeral. The vibrations surrounding the event gave me a great trust in the workings of life's larger events and passages. Many Sahaja Yogis are at an age where the loss of one or both parents is a likely reality. How loving Shri Mataji is in preparing us, and how protected we are by her, She reassures us that our discretion and thoughtless awareness will spontaneously move us through such events. While respecting our parents, we will always be helped to keep our sights on our ascent."